Ah, Discordianism. It’s the belief system for people who believe belief systems are hilarious.
At its core, Discordianism is a joke disguised as a religion, or maybe a religion disguised as a joke. It's dedicated to Eris, the Greek Goddess of Chaos, Confusion, and Slightly Inconvenient Printer Errors.
"All religions are real. Even the fake ones."
Discordianism cheerfully embraces paradox, contradiction, and bad puns. It includes such sacred texts as Principia Discordia, The Illuminatus! Trilogy, and whatever you dream up after drinking too much coffee at 2 a.m.
If you're wondering whether it's a parody, a philosophy, or a
lifestyle, the answer is “yes.”
If you’re asking whether you can be a Discordian, you
already are (print
this and put
it in your wallet for proof). Unless you aren’t.
That’s valid too.
Hail Eris. All Hail Discordia. Carry a rubber duck for spiritual safety.
Eris is the Greek Goddess of Chaos, Discord, and General Cosmic Mischief.
In mythology, she was famously uninvited to a divine party on Mount Olympus, because inviting Chaos to a party always goes well. In response, Eris did what any Goddess of Discord would do: she tossed a golden apple into the middle of the festivities. Inscribed on the apple were the words: “To the Fairest.” Cue divine drama.
Three Goddesses, Hera (Queen of the Gods), Athena (Goddess of Wisdom), and Aphrodite (Goddess of Beauty), each claimed the apple was meant for her. To settle the dispute, they asked a mortal named Paris to judge. Each Goddess offered him a bribe, and Paris chose Aphrodite, who promised him the love of the most beautiful woman in the world: Helen of Troy.
Spoiler: Helen was already married. This sparked the Trojan War. All because Eris wanted to spice up a party.
In Discordianism, Eris is our sacred instigator, a divine trickster who reminds us that all order contains chaos, and all seriousness deserves a little sabotage. Praise be unto the Goddess who understands the power of well-timed fruit.
Yes. Absolutely. Undeniably. Realer than a raccoon in a business suit. Everything offered here exists in the tangible, billable plane of reality... And if it sometimes smells faintly of surrealism and citrus, tha’s the point.
The services are delightfully real-world: exorcisms, weddings, blessings, unblessings, and perhaps the occasional holy paperwork, all performed by a certified, corporeal human being operating in consensus reality.
Accept no imitators, hallucinations, or oddly convincing sock puppets. This is the genuine article.
By all means, yes! Copy it, remix it, print it on toast, shout it from mountaintops. The texty bits are yours to mangle or glorify however you see fit.
BUT, and this is a Big Holy But(t), our name and logo are ours. Don't stick them on your thing unless you want to invoke the wrath of a mildly irritated chaos deity (or, you know, legalese).
Carry on, beautiful weirdo.